Sunday, February 1, 2009

The explanation...

I just did a "25 Random Things About Me" thing that is going around on Facebook. One of the things I put was "I hate girl's nights. I would rather spend time with my husband." I have gotten some ribbing about that. Women do not like that it seems. Let me clarify...and I may just rant a little.
I really enjoy nights out with some of my girl friends...more one on one nights out as opposed to a whole group thing. I rarely do it b/c I would rather spend time with my husband. But there are more reasons why I hate girl's nights. I dislike the general way the conversations go in regard to how they don't like this or that about their husbands. It really bothers me. I have been in situations where it happens often. It always turns my stomach. It seems to be the rule rather than the exception. I believe that we as women have that ability to honor our husbands in those settings by speaking well of them instead of tearing them down. Even when he does not "deserve" it. Really ladies it only makes us look bad not the men we are talking about. So go by the old rule in the case of husbands, "if ya don't have anything nice to say...don't say it at all".
Another thing that I do not like about "girl's nights" is the mundane conversations. I mean I get the first 20 minutes, or even 45 minutes, being about clothes and shoes...don't get me wrong I like these things just as much as the next girl. But when all a girl has got to talk about is counting calories and shopping trips things get boring pretty fast. I often sit and think..."I am taking precious time away from my husband and kids because ???????"
There are so many things in our world to talk about...so many interesting things! When I get together with old girl friends we have so much fun. I love THOSE "girl's nights"...although they generally happen in the middle of the day between taking care of a plethora of children....so technically they are not girl's nights I guess. But that is what life is and it's the spice of life to me.
Here's another thing... I enjoy the way things go down when my husband is around. He is SUPER funny. He's the life of any party. Where ever he is there is laughter. I miss him when he's not there to add to a conversation. I miss him when I go to a new place or hear someone speak and he's not there. I want to experience these things WITH him not with girls...that's why I married him...to do life together. I love sitting back in a group of people and watch him work the room. I love being by his side when he's doing it. He's my better half...why would I want to do stuff without my better half? I would rather be with my husband than with anyone else...that's the truth of the matter. I like you and all...:) I also like mixed groups better than just girls...always have and likely always will. It's so much more interesting!
I find the church the worst culprit for this...separating husbands and wives for events. Shaun and I have had many conversations about this. It's "good" for us to do things separately they say! REALLY!?! I'd like to know where in scripture we got that concept. Yes I know I am pushing buttons here b/c this is the popular thing at the moment. But honestly, more than anything I find it offensive. Life is busy enough and separating us enough without that added on top.
I get the whole valuing my friendships with my girl friends. And I do. I'll do a spa date or coffee any day girls. And the odd time I might even go for dinner and a movie without him. But please don't ask me to go away for the weekend with just the girls...I won't do it. And please don't be offended...I just like my husband better than I like you..no matter how wonderful you are :). It's just I've found that the best things in life ALWAYS INCLUDE MY HUSBAND!